Hi everyone!

Wow, it’s been a crazy year that has gone by. So many things have changed for me. I got my real estate license, I’ve expanded my piano studio, I got married, we’re saving money to buy a house, and so much more. My husband and I have a lot planned for what we want to do in the future. I love this blog even though it’s been awhile since I’ve updated it. You guys have followed me on my journey through these past few years and the growth I’ve had from sharing my life is insurmountable. I highly recommend anyone that wants to change their life to create a blog. You have to post at least 50 blog posts on it though. It’s not too bad. I think I’ve written about 300 blog posts in total from all of my blogs. I’m also seeing that I can make blog stories now. I’m excited for the future of my blogging career.

My last post was a huge moment in my blogging career. Even though I posted here on this smaller blog, I still feel powerful for sharing it. It was a story that I was hiding for a long time. When I finally wrote the entire story out on WordPress, I was liberated from it. I haven’t felt any resentment anymore from what happened to me.

Ultimately, I’m excited to continue sharing my life on here. I’ve seen my fellow bloggers expand their blogs and I’m so happy for them. They’ve done well on this platform. The support on WordPress is unlike anywhere else. I know that we have each other’s support and it feels good to know that I’m not alone on this blogging journey. I wish everyone on here a safe weekend and a happy life. I’ll continue to update here as much as I can. Thank you so much for taking the time to read my blogs.

Living on cloud 9

I don’t care what certain people think of me all that much. I know the kind of person that I am and I know that I work very hard. No one can change my opinion of myself. I know that I have done good in my life.

I know someone that is hurting inside because he inflicts emotional pain on everyone around him. I have distanced myself emotionally and physically. And I know that it hurts him. His personality will never change. I cannot stay around someone that is so disturbingly mean and ill minded. I am so glad that I have done this. My life has improved so much since. If you know someone that hurts you or has hurt you beyond repair, don’t let them continue to hurt you. Stay far away as possible. And take care of yourself. Since COVID, it has been more important than ever to focus on yourself. No, you are not selfish. Take care during this time and please stay safe.

Anxiety and Being Scared

I follow the Power of Positivity on Facebook and I came across this image right when I was in the middle of panicking. I am scared to drive again in the same area where I had an accident recently. I’m so scared. And I know that I will be okay as long as I learn to calm down. I hope that today will be a good day. I will try my best to breathe and believe that I will be okay.

Trying to find happiness again

I’m finding it incredibly hard again to foster my happiness and to protect it from outside influences. I talk about my happiness quite often and I guess what I mean by happiness is the ability to enjoy my life without negativity. I’ve found that I have a hard time forgiving and forgetting. That could be the reason why I’m not achieving the happiness I want. I haven’t forgiven anyone yet. And I’ve noticed that I hold on to grudges. If I can learn to let go, will these problems finally go away? I don’t know, but I’m willing to try anything to make myself happy.

It’s not fair

Sometimes, I believe that it’s not fair that people have the opportunity to take advantage of other people and they do so. If they don’t want whatever is done to them, then why do they do it to others? The reason I’ve came up with is that life is not fair. People are not always in tune with what God would want them to do. And they live without guidance in their life. I’m so tired of expecting people to behave properly and always being disappointed. For example, people will walk away from me while I’m in the middle of talking to them. It drives me absolutely crazy. If I walk away from them in the middle of their sentence, I am the one that is made to look crazy. I am constantly treated as below and made to feel like my life is not as important as other’s. And I am exhausted from dealing with this. I want to be treated well. I want people to treat me with decency at least. I am ultimately tired of giving more and receiving less. I know that my life is not worth less than those of other’s. Then why do people treat me like this? I don’t have an answer to these questions right now because I’m still searching for the answers. I know that my mind needs to rest though. My sanity is entirely gone through years of enduring this. And if no one can give me the peace and learn to respect me as a human being, then I will be by myself. I am happily content with myself that I am entirely at peace. I hope that I will find the healing that I need and I will continue to fight for myself. I am the only person that truly cares about me. And I’m not going to give up until I am receiving more.

If this isn’t what you want to do, then don’t do it

I’m beginning to believe that 2020 is about asserting your dominance over your own choices. I feel like we are all pressured into doing things that we don’t want to do. It’s important to have your own happiness too. I find it incredibly disheartening to see people living a miserable life because they have to do things that they didn’t choose.

I’m becoming a lot better at writing blog posts related to mental health. I’m definitely dealing with a lot of mental health things myself too. I need some time to do what I want. I want to have my life back, completely, without the influence of other people. This is my life and my life is precious to me. Give me my life back!

How much is enough?

I’m so tired of people that are not worth losing my sanity over. My life is fine without too many people in it. I’ve realized that having friends is so much better than family. Your friends respect your boundaries and they will care for you better than your family does. And your friends are fun to hang out with. I’m going on my vacation tomorrow and I’m so excited. I need some time to recharge away from all the negativity. I’m looking forward to it. And I’m leaving tomorrow early afternoon 😊 I’m going to shut off for awhile and just enjoy my vacation.

Daily Motivation #33

When people are obsessed with you and you just want to be alone. I just want no one to bother me. I don’t have the energy anymore to deal with this bs. I don’t care about being polite. I honestly don’t care. It’s so stupid. I know I just need to focus on my own stuff and all of this other stuff is a waste of time. Am I seriously going to sit here and think about simple house chores? No. So stupid. So done. I just need to be left alone.

Being in a relationship is so hard

When you and your partner hit a bump in your relationship, it’s so difficult to get everything back together. If it’s a big bump, the amount of work you need to fix it is even more. I’m so protective of my relationship and I know that we both want to be together. It’s so hard though. Maybe true love takes a lot of work. It requires both people to really want to be together. And I know that it’s worth it. I’m going to continue to work on my relationship. I hope that things will continue to foster and grow in a healthy way. Not everything is so simple, but true relationships can withstand a lot. The path to happiness is never easy. Everything will work out for the better.

Having a therapist helps a lot

I recently got a therapist that I talk to every day. We haven’t spoken too much on specific things because I’m still in the getting to know each other phase, but I’m excited to see how things change in the upcoming weeks. I’m not a perfect person and I definitely need a lot of help when it comes to relationships and stress management. I realized that I was doing a lot of the work by myself and maybe there was too much for me to worry about. It could be that one person can’t handle that much stress. I’ve learned that I need to slow down. My life has been a whirlwind of emotions that I’ve only created for myself. If I take the time to work out how to manage all of my emotions, I think I will definitely be a stronger person. I’ll let you know how everything goes in the next few weeks. I have my lsat test next week too. I’m hoping for a good day on test day.